Linkstew

"2 counties to halt all weddings, gay or not," the headline I read over Rick's shoulder said.

"Is one of them Kern!?" I asked excitedly, skimming ahead; "Of course it is."

"Due to lack of resources?" Rick muttered; "That's a pretty flimsy argument."

"I think I'd go right past 'flimsy' and clear on to 'transparent.' I know a judge can't say 'I reject your argument because you're Kern County,' but, well, it's true."

Bakersfield: We'll Kick Your Ass!

Ah, home sweet home. And that's really all I've got to say about that, because it pretty much speaks for itself.

I watched MTV's new reality show FM Nation last night.

Now of course there's a good answer to the implicit question of "Why on earth did you watch that!?", because otherwise why would I admit to having watched such a horrible show?

I watched FM Nation because the first episode was set in Bakersfield of all places, and featured such local highlights as street racing and a wet t-shirt contest. There'll be a few more reruns of the first episode, so if you really want to see an embarrassing portrayal of about ten residents of Bakersfield, check it out. Otherwise, I highly recommend you stay as far away as possible from the show. It's pretty bad.

You know you're not in Berkeley when, if all the parked cars squeezed together, there'd be about five more parking spots on that block.

The two most important things I need to know about buying a car I learned from spending 19 summers of my life in Bakersfield:

1. The only sufficiently reflective colors to paint a car are white or silver.
2. It'll be a freezing summer in Bakersfield hell before I buy a car without air conditioning.

It's Jury Summons season again, and this time, I got one, my mom got one, and Kevin got one.

I had a great plan for how I'd handle it if I did get called to serve, but I called last night and they said "call back wednesday night." But by Wednesday night I plan to be back in Berkeley, so if I get called in I'll have to call them and say "I'm in Berkeley working... It'll take me 6 hours to get there and 6 hours to get back, and I would have had to have left last night, but if you really want me to come in, I can be there... Tomorrow morning?"

But I did have a great plan:

• Step 1: Have long hair in a conservative (for california) city.
• Step 2: Wear all black in June in a place that gets crazy hot.
• Step 3: Bring a Game Boy along to play, just in case they're not already looking at me suspiciously.

It's strange that the last time I was in Bakersfield, it was significantly colder there than in Berkeley, but this time, it's way hotter. Ah, extremes!

But as hot as it gets during the day, Bakersfield summer nights are wonderfully pleasent. I can almost smell the nostalgia.

Ah, home sweet home. Where by "sweet" I mean the sweet smell of the air in the second smoggiest city in the US, of course.

You know, being reminded about Bakersfield almost makes me wish I were going home for Spring Break instead of going to Whistler.

Almost, but not quite.

Look, look, a vacation! I haven't actually had one of these in so long... Here are my plans:

• Finish Metal Gear Solid so I can play Metal Gear Solid 2. I'm currently about 1/4 through.
• Finish Rogue Leader, which I'm currently about 4/5 through.
• Finish Luigi's Mansion, which I haven't started, but which I've been told is short, easy, and fun.
• On the train ride home, play lots of The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons on my Game Boy. I meant to play it on the ride down, too, but I kind of got distracted by writing thousands upon thousands of words.

Of course, since I'm so awesome, let's check what I've forgotten:

• My extra cube controller, so now I've got to make a trip by the crazy store on Friday so I can play my brother some two-player wave race. Of course, I was planning to buy some extra controllers anyway once Smash Brothers comes out, but I don't like having the issue forced.
• My mom's green afghan, which she had my brother remind me to bring via IM about 3 minutes before I left, so I'm just a moron.

On my 4 days of notice, my sister and her husband decided to go to the TMBG concert in New Orleans tonight. Here's what she had to say:

Neal and I decided to go, since the tickets were only $15 each. It was a good show. Neal said it was one of the best club concerts he's been to in a long while. I liked that they played old as well as new songs. They have a lot of energy, and seem to have fun with what they do (all three Ds and two Js).

There is one thing about going out here that makes me miss California. In CA, people couldn't smoke in public buildings, which included bars. Sometimes I don't even want to go with Neal down to the corner pub because I don't want to deal with the smoke. Oh well, I guess I'm asking too much to have history, culture, and a smoke free environment.

Gak! I can't imagine suffering through an entire smoke filled concert! It must come as a real shock to California performers the first time they have some sort of tour. The very thought of it is almost enough to keep me from wanting to travel.

And um, if she wanted history and culture in California, she probably should have tried living somewhere besides Bakersfield. Like San Francisco, for example. Or really anywhere but Bakersfield.